Which Chocolate is the Best Chocolate?

Whether you’re having a quarter-life crisis or just generally craving something sweet, chocolate is your best friend. Almost everyone admits that the taste of the sugary substance provides them with a feeling of temporary happiness (unless of course, you’re allergic: in which case, it will give you the thrilling feeling of your throat closing up.) Overall, what I’m saying is that chocolate is one of the best things life has to offer, but the real question is, what kind? I’ve asked The Oracle staff to rate each of the following chocolates on a scale of one to ten and compiled the averages. Along with this is a description of each so that if you don’t believe us, you’re free to decide for yourself.

White chocolate:

Although white chocolate has an undeniably bad reputation, some hardcore white chocolate lovers may argue those claims with rebuttals. What these rebuttals are, I couldn’t tell you. Oracle members remain in doubt about the veracity of its “chocolate” claim, considering its lack of any actual cocoa. This specific type of abomination– I mean chocolate– is made of sugar, milk solids and cocoa butter. Unfortunately, I was unable to find an unbiased description of white chocolate, as even Google cannot find a reason to crave it.

Oracle Girls’ Rating: 6.2/10 (Okay, I was harsh.)

Milk chocolate:

Milk chocolate: sweet, chewy, and basically just the middle ground of chocolate. Among us Oracle girls, it has been called “neutral” and “a blend of dark and white.” Basically, it’s nothing special, not the best but definitely not the worst. In comparison to white chocolate, well, at least it’s real chocolate. The main difference between milk and dark chocolate is that the added dairy cuts the bitterness of the cocoa solids, making milk chocolate less sweet than white chocolate but sweeter than dark chocolate. Try it for yourself, it’s pretty good!

Oracle Girls’ Rating: 7/10

Dark chocolate:

Dark chocolate is without a doubt the best chocolate although I accidentally bought a dark chocolate bar containing 90% cocoa, so this review may not apply to a more palatable percentage of dark chocolate. Most percentages range from 60% to 70%. It was terrible and quite bitter, so I would not recommend this specific percentage of dark chocolate. Try a normal percentage of dark chocolate; it’s actually delicious.

Oracle Girls’ Rating: 3.1/10

Copyright Strunk 2020

Kass Strunk

Hi, I’m Kas! I’m a three-year junior at Blair Academy and this is my second season doing oracle. I’m interested in writing about events happening both around the world and in the Blair circle.