How to Survive Parents’ Weekend

Parent’s Weekend is almost here. It is not just a chance for parents to observe your life at Blair: it’s a war, a bloodless Hunger Game between parents and teachers and students. If you are scared of what your teachers may reveal to your parents, or how your parents will react to your messy lifestyle, here are a few tips from the Oracle Editorial team to get you through the madness safe and sound.  

1. Switch your parents’ name tags so that the teachers don’t know they are your parents.2. Tell your parents that Blair has changed into a 4.0 scale, so your 3.5 looks good.

3. Familiarize yourself with the salad bar so it is convincing when you tell them that you eat salad every day. 4. Talk to the people in your hallway and decide which room to clean so everyone can show it to their parents and say it’s theirs.

5. Fake an injury: order a cast on Amazon Prime so you can tell your parents that you are benched for a reason.

6. Tell everyone your parents don’t speak English, even if they do.

May the odds be ever in your favor. Go Bucs. Love you.

(Copyright 2017)


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